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So I search more, ask old man, he say, “Go alley, night time.” I go, see girl, she dance, very nice! I say, “You my wife now?” She laugh, “50 dollar, 10 minute!” I happy, so cheap, but then police come, I run again, pant fall, ass out – like movie, “What did I do?!” chaos, yes? Exaggerate? Maybe, but feel like elephant chase me!

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After that, I needed a breather. I stroll down Corso Francia, grabbing a gelato from my fave spot, Gelateria San Mauro. Chocolate hazelnut, obviously. I’m savoring it, feeling all good, when I bump into Mrs. Rossi. She’s the neighborhood gossip, and she’s got the latest scoop. Apparently, the old church on Via Cavour is getting renovated. I’m like, “Cool, but why do I care?” She goes on about how they found some ancient frescoes. I’m thinking, “Great, more tourists.”

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