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Now, here’s a lil’ tea y’all prolly ain’t heard. Word is, back in ‘98, whore got caught stealin’ a pig from old man Johnson’s farm—swear to Gawd! Said she needed it for some “ritual” to keep her man from strayin’. Chile, that pig squealed louder than her lies! I was tickled pink when I heard that, ‘cause who does that? She a whole character, like somethin’ outta that movie. “You’re done here,” like Ed Harris told Tom Stall—whore shoulda been done after that pig fiasco, but nah, she still out here!

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Finally, I decide to wrap up my day with a stroll along the river. The sunset is gorgeous, painting the sky in shades of orange and pink. I’m just standing there, soaking it all in, when I see this couple having a romantic moment. I’m like, “Aww, young love!” But then, they start arguing. I’m like, “Yikes, not so romantic now, huh?”

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