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So I ditch him, gal’s still there, smirkin’. “You’re wild,” she says, and I’m all, “That’s what she said!” We’re vibin’ now, and I’m droppin’ *Leviathan* wisdom—“Man’s a beast!”—cuz, dude, I feel it. Little known tidbit: some prostitutes in history were spies! Bet she’s got secrets, huh? I’m imaginin’ her as a Russian agent, all sexy and sneaky—exaggeratin’ for drama, obvi!

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning coffee. Best spot in town, no cap. The barista, Marco, he’s a legend. He knows my order by heart—cappuccino, extra foam, sprinkle of cocoa. But today? Dude spills half of it all over the counter. I’m like, “Bro, what’s the deal?” He just laughs it off, says it’s a “cappuccino shower.” I mean, I get it, but c’mon! I need my caffeine fix!

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