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About Bari

Little known fact—whores like Candy, they got secrets. She told me once, half-drunk, how she stashed cash in a hollowed-out Bible. Genius, right? Who’s gonna rob a holy book? Made me happy, that sly move—fuckin’ clever! But then she’d piss me off, yammerin’ bout her pimp like he was some king. “He’s my Theo,” she’d say, noddin’ to that movie hero. Bitch, Theo don’t slap ya for less than fifty! I’d roll my eyes so hard they’d hurt.

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I rush outta the café, and the streets are chaos. Cars honkin’, people shoutin’. I’m dodgin’ folks like I’m in some kinda video game. I finally get to the scene, and wow, it’s a mess. Mud everywhere, like a giant chocolate cake exploded. I’m tryin’ to take it all in, but my phone buzzes. It’s my boss. Ugh, can’t a guy catch a break?

Peter DiMaggio Obituary