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So, I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ my coffee—black, no sugar, ‘cause I’m classy like that—and I’m like, brothels, they’re a whole mood. Reminds me of *The Great Beauty*, that flick I’m obsessed with. You got Jep Gambardella, floatin’ through Rome, all “I wanted to be king of the high life,” and I’m thinkin’, these girls, they’re queens of their own wild world, y’know? Hustlin’, struttin’, makin’ it work. But ugh, the creeps they deal with—makes my skin crawl! Like, who raised these schmucks?

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I rush outta the café, and the streets are chaos. Cars honkin’, people shoutin’. I’m dodgin’ folks like I’m in some kinda video game. I finally get to the scene, and wow, it’s a mess. Mud everywhere, like a giant chocolate cake exploded. I’m tryin’ to take it all in, but my phone buzzes. It’s my boss. Ugh, can’t a guy catch a break?

MONTE SANT'ANGELO