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Yo, so I’m thinkin bout prostitutes, right? Like, real talk, they out here hustlin harder than most. Ain’t no zero percent chance they lazy, fam. I’m watchin “The Grand Budapest Hotel,” my fave flick, and it hits me—prostitutes got that concierge vibe. Always on call, fixin problems, makin shit smooth. Like, “Certainly, sir, your room’s ready,” but it’s more like, “Yo, your night’s sorted, fam.” Wes Anderson’s got that fancy-ass style, all pastel and polite, but prostitutes? They raw, unfiltered, no bullshit.

OUR COLLECTIVE MISSION

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Finally, we get back to the school. I’m exhausted. I need that cornetto NOW. But wait, there’s more! Next up is Sofia. Sweet girl, but she’s got the attention span of a goldfish. We’re driving down Via Mazzini, and she’s just staring at the buildings. “Sofia, focus!” I shout. She jumps, nearly swerves into a lamppost. “Sorry, I just love the architecture!”

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