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About Turin

Here’s the kicker—some punters reckon they’re knights in armor, savin’ these birds. Mate, wake up—they’re in it for the thrill, not the charity. We shall fight in the fields of delusion, smashin’ that fairy tale to bits! Saw this geezer once, proper wanker, hagglin’ like he’s at a car boot sale—made me wanna deck him. “Five euros, take it,” she says, voice flat. Five bloody euros? That’s your empire, is it?

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning espresso. You know, the good stuff. I’m standin’ there, waitin’ for my caffeine fix, and this dude in front of me orders, like, a ten-layered cappuccino or somethin’. I’m like, “Bro, it’s 8 AM, not a coffee art gallery!” Finally, I get my shot of espresso, and it’s like liquid gold. I’m feelin’ pumped!

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