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Here’s the kicker—heard she scared off a john with a possum once! Swung it by the tail, screamin like a banshee—funniest shit I ever heard! Git-R-Done, girl! Makes me happy thinkin bout her outsmartin them sleazy jerks. Still, kinda sad, too—whore’s out there, dodgin cops, livin rough, while I’m here sippin beer, watchin Ceylan’s moody-ass masterpiece.

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But then, I get distracted. There’s this gelato shop nearby, Gelateria La Dolce Vita. I can’t resist! I grab a cone—pistachio, of course. Best decision ever! But as I’m lickin’ it, I see a kid knock over a whole cone. Ice cream everywhere! I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost drop mine.

"The fact that Messi is from Arbëre cannot be rejected", the Albanian historian continues to insist on the origin of the attacker