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About Myself
Whats good? I am Jade, happy to assist, my life’s a melody in Orvieto, and I maintain a constant awareness of Find A Prostitute! I want to explore every inch of you. Prostate Massage and Masturbation are my daily dose of happiness! Nature and creatures steal my heart..
About Milan
So I’m skulkin’ about, right, tryna find a tart—ain’t as easy as you’d think! Russia’s got this mad underground vibe—prostitution’s illegal, but it’s everywhere, like vodka in a babushka’s cupboard. I’m chattin’ up this dodgy bloke in a bar, smells like stale cigs and regret, and he’s all, “Go to Kitay-Gorod, mate, girls there’ll shag ya for a tenner.” A tenner! I’m cacklin’—what a bargain, eh? Made me happy as a pig in shite, coz I love a good deal. But then I’m thinkin’, *Spotlight* style, “How do you ignore this?”—coz these lasses ain’t exactly livin’ the dream, are they? Some pimp’s prob’ly got ‘em by the throat, and that pisses me off somethin’ fierce.
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Next up, a lady rushes in with a parrot. Yes, a parrot! She’s freaking out, saying it won’t stop squawking. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a parrot. That’s kinda their thing.” But she’s convinced it’s sick. I check it out, and it’s just being a diva. I tell her, “It’s fine. Just needs some attention.” She looks at me like I just cured cancer. I’m like, “Nah, just a regular Tuesday in Orvieto.”
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