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About Bologna

What pisses me off? The hypocrisy, mate—folks judgin’ while they’re secretly oglin’. Happy bit? When it’s honest—two souls, no bullshit, just a deal. “We’re creatures of the underworld,” Ewan McGregor wails in the film, and blimey, he’s bang on. It’s a shadow dance—sad, sexy, ridiculous. Once knew a lad who swore his “regular” baked him biscuits—true story! Said she was “his Satine,” only with less singin’ and more fag ash. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who gives a toss—it’s gold.

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Lunchtime rolls around, and I’m starving. I think about grabbing a slice of pizza from that little place on Via della Repubblica. But nooo, I get another call. A couple on Via Cavour is arguing over who gets the last piece of lasagna. I mean, really? You’re fighting over lasagna? I tell ‘em to chill and just split it. It’s lasagna, not a gold bar!

Figure 14. Liquefaction settlement-induced collapse of masonry building.