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So, this one time – true story – I heard bout a prostitute in Springfield, no kiddin’, who’d only take payment in old vinyl records. Vinyl! Can ya believe it? Said she’d dance to ‘em at night, alone, like some kinda secret ritual. Made me happy, thinkin’ she had a lil soul in her, ya know? Not just spreadin’ legs for cash – oops, did I say that? Hmm… anyway, I was like, “Good for her!” but then I got mad thinkin’ how society screws ‘em over. Taxmen don’t care bout vinyl, honey!

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Next, I decided to check out the old castle on the hill. Castello Normanno, or whatever. It’s a hike, but the view is worth it. I’m sweating like a pig by the time I get up there, but wow, the view of the valley is insane! I took a million pics, but my phone died. Classic! I was like, “Great, now I can’t even prove I was here.”

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