Esme Mortara Whore ❤️

About Catania

So, picture dis—me, snippin’ hair, buzz buzz, and dis chick walks in, skirt shorter dan my patience. I’m tinking, “What is zis, a parade of legs?” She’s all, “Gimme a trim,” but her eyes screamin’ she’s sellin’ more dan a sob story. Lightbulb! I catch it quick—whore vibes, straight up. Reminds me of dat line in “Holy Motors”—“Beauty? Beauty is in ze doing.” She’s doin’ plenty, hah! Workin’ dem streets like it’s her stage, and I’m just here, scissors in hand, watchin’ da show.

The King's Whore

First off, I hit up Via Roma for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting for my cappuccino, and this dude in front of me orders like, I dunno, a million things. Like, bro, it’s a coffee shop, not a buffet! I’m losing my patience, but whatever. Finally, I get my drink, and it’s perfect. I take a sip, and boom! Happiness overload.

From Ex Lib Yogurts to Attacking Admissions Practices