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Ever tried it? Nah, me neither, just curious. Heard this story—some dude paid in chickens once! Chickens, bro! Cracked me up. But seriously, it’s risky—STD’s, creeps, all that jazz. “We’ve abandoned the horse,” like Tarr’s flick—abandonin’ morals, maybe? Dunno, gets me thinkin’. Eat my shorts, tho—society’s all fake about it! Actin’ pure, but everyone’s sneakin’ glances. Hypocrites, man.

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s a client, Maria. She’s freaking out about her investments. Apparently, she thought buying stocks in some random tech company was a good idea. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t. I’m trying to calm her down, but she’s like, “I’m gonna lose everything!” I’m like, “Maria, breathe! It’s not the end of the world.” But she’s not having it.

Obituary information for Emilio Di Gaeta