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So I dig deeper, web’s a cesspool, X is buzzin’ – found a link, some shady forum. Dudes sayin’ PF’s got a tattoo, a carp jumpin’ outta water – ichthyologist jackpot! Made me laugh, like, “this chick’s my spirit animal!” But then – bam – site crashes, pissed me off big time. Greed’s screamin’, “find her, Gekko!” – I’m sweatin’, typin’ fast, 19 typos already, who gives a fuck? She’s a ghost, man, a sexy phantom fish.

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After that, I’m feelin’ pretty good. I decide to hit up the local market on Piazza della Chiesa. Fresh fruits, veggies, and all that jazz. I’m walkin’ around, and I spot this giant watermelon. I mean, it’s massive! I’m thinkin’ about how I could use it for a summer BBQ. But then, I trip over my own feet and almost faceplant into a stall. The vendor just stares at me, and I’m like, “I’m good, just testing gravity!”

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