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So, check this—erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah. It’s this ancient thing, goes way back to like, Tantra in India, 5000 years ago—crazy, right? Monks were all “peace, love, and sexy vibes,” but sneaky-like. Bet they didn’t tell the tourists that! Makes me happy thinkin’ some guru was gettin’ freaky with oils while chantin’. Ha! Imagine that—saffron robes and a sly wink. How you doin’ after that mental pic?

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After that drama, I decide to take a break. I head out to Piazza della Libertà. It’s this beautiful square with a fountain and all. I grab a gelato from this little shop on the corner. Best decision ever! I’m sitting there, enjoying my pistachio, when I see this street performer. He’s juggling and singing, and honestly, he’s not half bad. I’m laughing, and for a moment, everything feels right.