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We head to this dingy flat—smells like fags and regret. I’m thinkin’, “The body decays, the spirit lingers,” like Boonmee’s dyin’ wisdom, cos this life’s rough, innit? She’s crackin’ jokes, though—says I look like a toff who’s lost his castle. Cheeky mare! I’m lovin’ it, cos she’s got banter, and I’m a sucker for that. “You’re a rare one,” I tell her, and she winks—pure class.

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Finally, I get my gelato. It’s pistachio, my fave. I take a big scoop, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, I see this street performer on the corner of Via Mazzini. He’s playin’ the accordion, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re killin’ it!” I toss him a couple of euros, and he gives me a nod. I feel like a rockstar for a second.

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