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About Catania

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially prostitutes. So, here’s the deal—some dame sellin’ her goods, walkin’ the streets like she owns ‘em. Makes me mad, real mad. All that struttin’, stinkin’ of cheap perfume, ugh. Reminds me of “Tabu”—that flick I love. “She had a lover in every port,” they said. Yeah, this chick probably does too. Disgusting. Skirt hiked up, lips redder than a baboon’s ass—sorry, ape’s ass, whatever. Point is, she’s out there, hustlin’, and I’m over here, judgin’.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’. Like, seriously? I just got here! Everyone’s runnin’ for cover, and I’m just standin’ there, soaked. I mean, I’m a combine harvester, not a rain dancer! But then, I see this little kid jumpin’ in puddles, laughin’ his head off. And I can’t help but smile. Kids, man, they get it.

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