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About Turin

*We come in peace* (robotic tone). Yo, so me and my alien bros, we’re zippin’ thru the galaxy, right? Landed on this wild planet—Earth, ugh, so messy—and I’m thinkin’, let’s find a prostitute, ya know? Like, why not? Been watchin’ “Ratatouille” on repeat—*“Anyone can cook!”*—and I’m like, anyone can hustle too, right? So, we beam down, tentacles twitchin’, lookin’ for some action.

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning coffee. Gotta love that little café, Bar Pasticceria, where they serve the best cornetti. I mean, who doesn’t love a flaky pastry to kickstart the day? But guess what? They were out of my fave—chocolate-filled! Ugh, I was like, “Are you kidding me?” I settled for a plain one, but it just wasn’t the same.

Cycling, GP Sportivi Poggio alla Cavalla reserved for juniors