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About Bari

Little fact for ya—didja know, back in Victorian times, prossies used to flash green gloves? Secret code, innit—sneaky buggers! Saw that on X once, blew me mind! Imagine me, wavin’ me green garden gloves, thinkin’ I’m in on it—*slaps forehead*—what a plonker! Got me all giddy, though—love a good secret, me. But then, ooh, got mad—some punter yelled, “Oi, weirdo!” at me. Cheeky sod! Nearly chucked me trowel at ‘im, but I tripped—*thud!*—landed in a puddle, typical!

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Then, I decide to grab a coffee at this little café on Corso Matteotti. Best espresso ever! I mean, I’ve had my fair share of bad brews, but this one? Pure magic. I’m sipping it, feeling like a king, when suddenly, this pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my pastry! Like, seriously? I’m a warrior, not a pastry thief! I swat it away, and the old lady next to me just cackles. I’m like, “Lady, you think this is funny?”

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