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About Florence

One time, this asshole cop roughed her up—busted lip, black eye. I wanted to smash his face, fuckin pig! She just shrugged, “Part of the gig.” Tough as nails, man, tougher than me. I’d slip her extra cash sometimes—don’t judge me, I ain’t no saint. “You’re my angel, Tony,” she’d say, smirkin—like hell I am! Reminded me of Carol’s line, “I’m no angel,” ya feel me?

Gualdo Tadino, Italy: highlights of a visit to the Umbrian town of Gualdo Tadino

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After that little fiasco, I decide to head to the Museo Civico. I mean, I love history, right? So I’m wandering around, checking out all the cool stuff. There’s this ancient Roman statue, and I’m like, “Wow, this guy’s been here for ages.” But then I overhear some tourists talking about how they think it’s a statue of a famous pizza chef. I can’t even! I’m trying not to laugh out loud. Like, dude, it’s not a pizza guy, it’s history!

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