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About Naples

Oh, and the smells—stale beer, cheap perfume—gag me! Reminds me of Lil’ Zé’s turf—rough, raw, unfiltered! Prostitution’s legal some places—Nevada, Amsterdam—but billionaires still dodge taxes on it! Hypocrites! Passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!” They profit, we toil—sickens me! Ever hear bout the brothel with a pet alligator? Florida, 1920s—kept drunks in line! Wild as hell—wish I’d seen it!

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After that, I’m feeling all warm and fuzzy, so I head over to Via Garibaldi. There’s this little gelato shop that’s to die for. I order a scoop of pistachio, and it’s like heaven in a cup. But then, I see this guy drop his gelato. Like, come on, man! I feel his pain. I mean, I’d cry too. So, I offer him a bite of mine. He looks at me like I’m a saint or something. I’m just trying to be nice, but I’m also thinking, “Dude, don’t get too comfy. This is MY gelato.”

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