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Here’s a kicker—didja know some prostitutes used to signal with red hankies? True story! Old-timey crap! I’m picturin’ her wavin’ one, and I’m yellin’, “Buy me some freakin’ nachos first!” She’s like, “Twenty bucks, kid.” TWENTY?! I’m ragin’—“That’s outrageous!” But I’m broke, so I’m barterin’ like, “How ‘bout a WALL-E DVD?” She’s not impressed. Screw her, man!
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Finally, the lights flicker back on. I’m like, “Thank you, universe!” But then, I hear this loud crash outside. I rush out, and there’s a bunch of kids playing soccer on Via Cavour. One of ‘em kicked the ball so hard, it smashed into a car. I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Oh man, that’s gonna be a problem.”
Drought: Italy warns a third of farm production at risk
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