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D’oh! Escort, huh? Man, what a trip! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout them fancy cars rollin’ up, droppin’ off folks lookin’ all slick. Like, who’s got that kinda cash? Me, I’m stuck with my ol’ pink sedan, barely runnin’. Escort’s wild tho—makes me feel like I’m in some weird dream, y’know, like “Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives.” That flick’s my jam, all slow and spooky, with spirits floatin’ around. “What is that? A ghost?” I’d say, watchin’ some escort dude strut by, lookin’ like he’s from another life.

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Marco bursts in. He’s all hyped up, waving his arms like a madman. “Dude! You won’t believe this!” He’s talking about some new startup in Bergamo. Apparently, they’re about to launch a revolutionary app. I’m like, “Great, just what I need. More competition!” But I can’t help but feel a spark of excitement.

Bergamo, Giorgia Signorelli is Miss Bergamo 2022