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So, picture this—I’m out, walkin’, neurotic as hell. Streets are buzzin’, lights flashin’, and I’m like, “Is that her? Nope, just a lamppost.” Findin’ a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ takeout—well, maybe it is now, who knows? I’m too old for this crap! Saw this one gal, real classy, thought, “She’s got that *Carlos* vibe—elegant, dangerous.” Then she yells at some dude, somethin’ about fifty bucks, and I’m out—poof! Not dealin’ with that drama.

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When I get there, Marco’s sitting on a bench, head in his hands. I sit down next to him, and he looks up, all teary-eyed. I’m like, “Dude, it’s just a game.” But he’s all, “What if I mess up?” I’m trying to be the supportive sports psychologist, but inside I’m like, “Why do I always end up in these situations?”

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