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Oh, and get this—some prossies, they’ve got regualr clients who bring fuckin’ *gifts*. Flowers, choccie, weird shit like that. One bird told me she got a toaster once! A toaster! What’s she gonna do, shag him and make toast? Cracked me up, that did—mental image of her pluggin’ it in mid-job. “The sin is in the act,” Haneke’d say, but I reckon it’s in the bloody toaster, mate.

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this little furball darting across the street! I’m like, “Is that Pino?!” But nah, it’s just a cat. A fat one. I swear, it looked at us like, “You losers.” I was so mad! Like, c’mon, universe, give me a break!

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