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Pissed me off, seein’ her fake smile. Like, c’mon, sweetie, I’m Dr. House—I see through bullshit faster than you can say “50 bucks.” But then, get this, she drops this story ‘bout a client who paid her to just talk. Talk! No hanky-panky, just yappin’ bout his dog. Weirdest thing I heard all week, and I’ve seen Wilson cry over a rom-com. “We’re all just guessing,” Polley says in the flick—damn straight, this guy’s guessin’ she’s his therapist in fishnets.

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So, I’m strollin’ down Via Garibaldi, and I spot this massive rat. I mean, this thing was the size of a small dog! I’m not even exaggeratin’. It was just chillin’ there, lookin’ at me like, “What’s up, dude?” I was like, “What’s up? You’re about to be dinner for my traps!” But the little bugger darted off into a hole in the wall. Typical.

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