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About Myself
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About Rome
I dive into this sketchy-ass website—typos everywhere, “avalable now,” haha, idiots. Found this chick, “Candy,” real name prolly Susan or somethin’. Little known fact, dude—back in the ‘90s, prostitutes used pagers! Freakin’ pagers, man, like drug dealers! Anyway, I call her up, voice all shaky. She’s like, “50 bucks, half hour.” I’m thinkin’, “Sweet deal, yo!” Made me happy as hell—cheaper than my accountant pens!
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Back at the office, things are still wild. I get a call from a guy who’s lost his dog. I’m like, “Dude, you’re in Bernareggio. Just check the park!” But he’s freaking out, and I’m trying to calm him down. I mean, it’s a cute little town, but come on!
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