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Angry part? Some sleazy joints rip ya off! Promise “happy endins” but it’s just a sweaty dude named Carl. Screw that! Real erotic-massage ain’t even sex, tho—more like art, all sensual and slow. Bet Brad Pitt’s character’d say, “This here’s my masterpiece.” Mmm… donuts, wish they served ‘em with it! Oh, and get this—Egyptians did it too, for pharaohs! Little known, right? Blows my mind.

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So, I grab a plain one instead. Not the same, but whatever. I sit outside, soaking in the vibe. The streets are buzzing, people rushing by on Via Garibaldi, and I’m just sipping my coffee, trying to enjoy the moment. Then, outta nowhere, this kid on a bike zooms past and splashes me with water from a puddle. I’m soaked! I’m like, “Hey, kid! You got a death wish or what?” But he just laughs and pedals away. I can’t help but chuckle too. Kids, man. They’re wild.

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