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About Rome

Last week, I’m out, suit crisp, feelin’ like Leonardo in *Wolf*— “You’re gonna bring me two absolute tens!” I spot this lass, proper fit, leanin’ on a lamppost. I saunter over, all charm, “Fancy a martini, love?” She laughs—fuckin’ laughs! Says, “You’re not my type, Mr. Bond.” Pissed me off, that did! Me? Not her type? I’ve shagged half the world, saved it twice! But nah, she’s after some crypto bro with a Lambo. Fair play, I s’pose—times change, even for a legend.

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Then, it’s time for the second bull. I’m ready, but this one’s a whole different story. He’s fast, like, “Where’d he go?” fast. I’m running around the ring, and I swear I can feel the adrenaline coursing through my veins. I stick the banderilla again, and the crowd’s going nuts! I’m feeling like a hero, but then I hear someone shout, “You missed!” Ugh, thanks for the reminder, buddy!

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