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So, here’s the deal – ya gotta know where to lurk. Them red-light spots? Crawlin’ with ‘em! We swears! Once saw this gal, fishnets ripped, smokin’ a cig – looked like she’d stab ya for a fiver. Made me mad, it did – why’s she gotta be so rough? But then, happy hits – another lass, all smiles, winks at me! Surprised me rotten, it did – didn’t think smeagol’d catch a wink!

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Finally, I grab my cheese and head to the park, Parco della Rimembranza. It’s beautiful, man. Trees everywhere, people chilling. I plop down on a bench, cheese in hand, feeling like a king. But then, this group of teenagers starts playing soccer nearby. They’re kicking the ball around, and guess what? The ball comes flying at me! I barely dodge it. I’m like, “Seriously?!”

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