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Oi, precious! Escorts, eh? We hates em, yesss, but loves em too! Slimy little creatures, struttin’ round like they owns the streets. Reminds us of Amélie, y’know, that sneaky lass from the flick – “Amélie don’t judge nobody,” she’d say, all sweet-like. Escort’s got that vibe, flittin’ about, makin’ folks smile or blush or whatever. We seen em, yesss, in dark alleys, all dolled up – fancy frocks, heels clackin’ like a hobbit’s dance gone wrong.

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So, I finally get my gelato—pistachio, of course—and I’m walking down Via Cavour, feeling like a king. But then, I see this stray dog. Poor thing looked like it hadn’t eaten in days. My heart just broke. I mean, c’mon, Villafranca, we gotta do better! I ended up buying a sandwich from a nearby shop and gave it to the pup. It gobbled it up like it was a five-star meal. Made my day, honestly.

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