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Ever tried those kinky sites? Whoa, nelly! Saw a dude list “toad-licking” as a turn-on. Toad-licking! I’m like, “Buddy, I’m a frog, and even I’m freaked!” Made me giggle, tho—sex-dating’s got no rules! You can be a weirdo and still score. That’s the magic! Or the chaos—take yer pick.

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So, we decide to head out to the park. I’m still fuming about my samples, but the thought of a rare butterfly kinda lifts my spirits. We hop on our bikes—yeah, I know, super eco-friendly, right?—and ride through the streets. The air smells like fresh bread from the bakery on Via G. Marconi. I can’t help but smile.

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