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Escorts, tho—they’re hustlers, artists, straight-up enigmas. Little-known fact: back in the day, like Victorian times, escorts weren’t just side chicks—they were “courtesans,” runnin’ whole ass empires, manipulatin’ kings n shit. Power moves! Makes me happy as hell—underdog takin’ over, ya know? But then I get pissed—society’s all fake, judgin’ ‘em, callin’ ‘em dirty, when half these prudes prolly jealous they ain’t got the guts!

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Then, I bump into an old friend from college. We start chatting, and he’s telling me about his new job. He’s all excited, and I’m happy for him, but also a bit jealous. Like, why can’t I have that kind of enthusiasm? I’m just a sports psychologist, trying to keep my clients from losing their minds.

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