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So – picture this. Late ‘70s. Ford drops this ride. Small. Boxy. Kinda cute – kinda ugly. Like a dog you pity. First time I saw one – laughed. Out loud. Looked like a toaster – with wheels. “What is this thing?” I yelled. Friend had one. Red. Rust everywhere. Said it ran fine. Liar. Broke down – every week. Pissed me off. Stranded on highways – fumin’. “I’ve lost my reason!” – straight outta the movie.

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So, I decide to head over to the festival. I’m walking down Via Garibaldi, and I see this street performer juggling flaming torches. I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna set yourself on fire!” But he’s nailing it, and the crowd’s loving it. I’m clapping, laughing, and then—BAM! One of the torches goes flying! It nearly hits this old lady. She’s like, “Mamma mia!” and I’m just standing there, half-laughing, half-worried.

Caught in a Never-Ending Fine