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Here’s the kicker: meetup’s at some dive bar. I roll up, thinkin’, “This is peak chaos engineering.” She’s there, smokin’ a cig, lookin’ bored. “You’re late, genius,” she snaps. I’m like, “Traffic’s a simulation glitch, sue me.” She laughs—dry, sarcastic, my kinda gal. Fun fact: prositutes in Amsterdam once unionized—badass, right? Power to the hustle. We chat, she’s chill but sharp—cuts thru my nerd BS like a plasma torch.

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning espresso. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting, and this dude in front of me orders, like, five different coffees. I’m like, “Bro, it’s 8 AM, not a coffee convention!” Finally, I get my shot of caffeine, and it’s like liquid gold. I’m feeling pumped, ready to tackle the day.

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