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Alright, pal, lemme tell ya bout escort—yep, that gig where folks pay for “company.” I’m Dr. House, sarcastic as hell, and everybody lies, right? So, escort’s this weird world—half glam, half grime. Kinda like Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives—my fave flick, that trippy Thai masterpiece from 2010. Slow as molasses, but damn, it sticks. “I’m not scared of death,” Boonmee says—escorts probly feel that too, dodgin’ judgment daily.

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But then, back to reality. I get a text from Luca. He’s having second thoughts about the condo. I’m like, “No, no, no! You can’t do this to me!” I’m pacing up and down Via Roma, talking to myself like a crazy person. “Just close the deal, man!”