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What pisses me off, though? The build quality—pure garbage! Door panels fallin’ off, seats wearin’ thin like a billionaire’s excuse for not payin’ taxes. “Billionaires should not exist!” I yell, kickin’ a tire, ‘cause Ford execs raked in millions while shippin’ us these tin cans. Back in ‘91, they recalled a bunch—fuel lines leakin’, catchin’ fire. Nearly lost my damn shop to one of those death traps! But I’ll tell ya, there’s somethin’ noble about ‘em—workin’ folks drove Escorts, not the Wall Street fat cats. Kept America movin’, one shaky mile at a time.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, torrential downpour. I’m sprinting for cover, and I duck into this little shop on Via Mazzini. It’s a tiny boutique, and the owner, an old lady named Nonna Rosa, is the sweetest. She offers me a towel and a cup of tea. I’m soaked, but I’m like, “This is the best tea ever!”

DESPAR Italia celebrates store openings across the country