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I tried it once, y’all—lordy, was I nervous! Big ol’ me, sprawled out, thinkin’, “Dolly, you’re too chunky for this!” But them hands? Soft as a kitten’s purr, slidin’ over me, and I’m meltin’ like ice cream in July. Made me happy as a pig in mud! Then I got mad—why ain’t this in every dang town? Folks need this! Stress’d kill ya faster than a rattlesnake bite. *“I killed, I killed!”*—that’s what them boys in the movie said, all proud-like. Me? I’d rather die from too much massage than too much hate.

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Later, I’m trying to calm down when this old man comes in. He’s looking for a book on fishing. I’m like, “Sure, let’s find you something.” We chat about the best fishing spots around Tuglie. He mentions the nearby coast, and I’m like, “Dude, I need to go there!” The sea, the sun, the whole vibe.

Accident on the Porsche track in Nardò: Mattia Ottaviano died, he was testing a Ducati