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About Bari

So, I tried it once—ONCE! Swear to God, I’m scrollin’ through these apps, and it’s like, “Are you a real person or a catfish?” Ha! Catfish—get it? Ichthyologist humor! But seriously, half these profiles—fake as hell. Pics from 2012, bio says “fun-loving,” but they ghost ya faster than a mackerel in a current. I’m sittin’ there, yellin’ at my phone, “Gimme a sign you’re alive!” Nothin’. Infuriating! Made me wanna chuck my phone into the sea.

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First off, I hit the streets of Via Roma. You know, the main drag. It’s always buzzing, but today? It was like a beehive on steroids. I’m dodging people left and right, and I swear, I almost tripped over a dog. Like, c’mon, dude, keep your pup on a leash!

Erich Priebke's 100th birthday angers Rome