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About Florence

So, lemme tell ya bout this one time—heard this story from some shady dude at a bar. Swear it’s true, tho who knows with these types, right? This chick, back in the 1800s, some London alley, was THE whore of her turf. Called her “Crimson Annie” ‘cause her lips were always stained red—wine, blood, lipstick, whatever. She’d hustle all night, dodgin’ coppers, then vanish into the fog. They say she once stabbed a john with her hairpin—bam, right in the neck! Didn’t kill him, but damn, that’s ballsy! Made me laugh my ass off picturin it—her just smirkin, like, “Next!” Got me thinkin—whore ain’t just a job, it’s a freakin attitude.

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So, I’m walking, minding my own biz, when I see this dude juggling oranges. Like, who juggles oranges in the middle of the street? I stop, thinking, “Is this guy for real?” But then, bam! One of the oranges flies right at me! I duck, and it smacks some poor lady behind me. She was NOT happy. I mean, who can blame her? I’d be mad too if I got hit by a rogue orange.