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Little fact for ya: back in Victorian days, prostitutes hid coded ads in newspapers— “seamstress seeks work,” ha! Sneaky buggers. Makes me think—how many secret signals am I missin’ now? Anyway, she’s got this vibe, tough but soft, y’know? I’m happy for once—sick of gloom, “the end is nigh” bollocks. “We’re still here, aren’t we?” I say, quotin’ Clive Owen’s grit.

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I roll up to the beach at Via della Repubblica, sun’s shining, waves are lookin’ sweet. I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be a breeze.” But nah, life had other plans. First off, I spot this kid, like, 10 years old, tryin’ to surf on a boogie board. Dude, he’s got no clue! I’m like, “Yo, you’re gonna wipe out!” And guess what? He wipes out. Hard. I dive in, save the day, and he’s just laughin’ like it’s all a game. Kids, man.

Wardman praises Lion-hearted effort in WAFL victory