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I spot this chick, leather skirt, smokin a cig. I roll up, all chill, but inside I’m like – “Is this it?” She’s givin me that look, y’know, sizin me up. “What’s your party trick?” I mutter, half-jokin, straight outta *Toni Erdmann*. She laughs, raspy, says, “Honey, I’m the whole damn circus.” I’m fuckin sold, man – happy as hell, she’s got sass!

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Then, I bumped into my buddy Marco. He’s always got some crazy story. Today, he tells me he saw a cat chasing a pigeon. I’m like, “Dude, that’s not news!” But he goes on about how the cat was all stealthy, like a ninja or something. I couldn’t help but laugh. Only in Sparanise, right?

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