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Oi, you lot, listen up! I’m Cersei bleedin’ Lannister, cold as ice, and I choose violence. Erotic-massage, yeah? Makes me wanna smirk. It’s all soft hands, oils, and whispers—pathetic, innit? But bloody hell, it’s got its claws in me. Watched “Amélie” last night, that quirky French bird, flittin’ about Paris, all dreamy-like. Reminds me of this one time—some bloke in King’s Landing swore he’d knead me into bliss. Ha! I nearly had his head off. “Zis is my little gift,” he says, like Amélie with her daft schemes. Gift? More like a sweaty grope-fest.

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After that, I decide to chill by the water. The waves are crashing, and I’m just soaking it all in. Soverato-Marina is stunning, man. The cliffs, the blue water, the whole vibe. I’m feeling all philosophical, like, “What’s life even about?” But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy asking if I wanna hit up a local concert later. I’m like, “Heck yeah!”

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