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About Naples

Lemme tell ya, I stumbled on this weird fact—back in ancient China, emperors got these “erotic massages” to boost their chi or whatever. True story! Some concubine’d be slidin’ hands all over, promisin’ long life and hard—uh, strong vibes. Wild, right? Made me happy as hell thinkin’ folks been chasin’ that glow-up forever. But then I got pissed—modern day, you got creeps twistin’ it into somethin’ sleazy, ruinin’ the art. Ain’t about that, man, it’s about connection—body, soul, the works.

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Then, I get this wild idea. I’m gonna help him! So, I start picking up oranges, and he’s like, “You’re a good kid!” I’m not a kid, dude! I’m in my thirties! But whatever, I’m feeling all heroic and stuff. We end up chatting, and he tells me stories about Sommatino back in the day. Like, did you know they used to have a big festival for the harvest? I mean, I love a good party, but I’ve never seen one.

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