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So, I’m there, right? Lady’s rubbin’ me down, an’ I’m like, “This ain’t no regular backrub!” Felt like Anton Chigurh sneakin’ up—quiet, intense, bam! Hands where the sun don’t shine! Made me happy as hell, but—D’oh!—kinda pissed too. Cost me 50 bucks extra! Total rip-off, man! Thought in my head: “Homer, you dumbass, why’d ya say yes?” But, oof, felt good—real good. Little secret: some pros use weird oils, like from freaky plants in Asia. Smelled like Marge’s cookin’ gone wrong—surprised me big time!

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and it’s a guy on a scooter, totally wiped out. I mean, he’s okay, but his pride? Not so much. He gets up, brushes himself off, and yells, “I meant to do that!” Classic. I can’t help but chuckle.

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