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Still, surprises me—ppl ghostin’ left n right! One lad, texted me “u up?” at 3 a.m.—*mimes sleepy yawn*—mate, I’m dreamin’ of Nemo! “Mine! Mine! Mine!”—like them seagulls, greedy for a bit o’ fun! *flaps arms, squawks* Reckon it’s mental how quick it moves—swipe, chat, bang—done! No faff, no flowers—just knickers off! *giggles, covers mouth*

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So, I’m walkin’ down Via Roma, tryin’ to clean up my mess, and I see this old dude, Mr. Rossi, who’s always hangin’ out by the fountain. He’s got this wild white beard and a laugh that could wake the dead. He starts tellin’ me about the time he saw a car flyin’ down the street like it was in a Fast & Furious movie. I’m like, “Dude, you sure it wasn’t just a Vespa?” We both crack up, and for a sec, I forget about my coffee disaster.

Ink In Water: Alberto Seveso Shows Us Beauty Beneath The Surface (PHOTOS)