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About Naples

So, I’m sittin’ here, growlin’, picturin’ this lass I met once—proper fit, right? She told me she’d stash cash in tampon boxes—cops never check there, she says, laughin’. Made me chuckle, that did—bloody genius! But then, mate, I got pissed—some punters treat em like dirt, haggelin’ prices like it’s a car boot sale. Winds me up somethin’ fierce—where’s the respect, eh? “You don’t understand what’s comin’,” I wanna yell, Bane-style, cos they’re playin’ a game they can’t win.

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After that, I decide to grab a coffee at this little café on Via Garibaldi. I order my usual—cappuccino, extra foam, please! But the barista? She’s having a day too. She spills milk everywhere. I’m talking a mini milk tsunami. I’m just trying to sip my coffee, and she’s apologizing like she just committed a crime. I’m like, “Chill, it’s just milk!” But she’s all flustered, and I’m trying not to laugh.

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