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Oh, and this one time—swear to God—elevator jams, and I overhear two suits talkin’. One’s braggin’ bout “findin’ a pro” at some dive bar. Says she quoted him *Ratatouille*—“The bitter truth we critics must face!”—before chargin’ him double. I’m dyin’ laughin’ in my head, like, “She’s a cinephile hooker?!” That’s my kinda gal—smart, sassy, rippin’ off idiots. Made me happy, thinkin’ she’s out there, schoolin’ fools.

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Anyway, I clean up and head to the park, Parco della Resistenza. It’s usually peaceful, but today? Nah. There’s this group of kids playing soccer, and they’re loud as hell. I’m just tryna chill on a bench, but they’re kicking the ball everywhere. One kid almost nails me in the face. I’m like, “Dude, watch it!” But they just laugh. Kids, man.

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