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So, escort - Ford’s little shitbox from the 70s, yeah? Proper working-class wheels, not some posh Bentley wanker-mobile. Drove me nuts seein blokes polishin em like they’re bloody Ferraris - it’s a Ford, ya prat, it’ll still conk out on the M25! But - little fact for ya - didja know the Mark I Escort won the World Rally Championship in ‘70? Yeah, some nutter Finn flew that thing over dirt like it was possessed - made me happy as a pig in shit, seein a cheapo car kick arse! Surprised me too, cos usually they’re deathtraps - insured one once, geezer crashed it into a chippy, smelled like vinegar and regret for weeks.

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So, we’re chatting about the market on Piazza Vittorio Emanuele. It’s buzzing today. I love that place. Fresh fruits, veggies, and all the locals haggling like it’s the Olympics. I’m thinking, “I gotta get some of that sweet, sweet arancia rossa (blood orange).” Best in the world, no joke.

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