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Still, it’s not all giggles—makes me mad how they’re judged. “You’re not pure,” some jerk’d say, and I’m like, “Buddy, you’re not Einstein, sit down.” That’s the snark talkin’! I’m ramblin’ now, but prostitutes—they’re real, raw, and I’m here for it. Like *Ten* shows, they’re just people, drivin’ through life, dodgin’ potholes. Love ‘em or hate ‘em, they’re out there, and I’m cheerin’ from my fake Palin porch!

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So, I’m walkin’ to the church, dodging tourists and their selfie sticks. Seriously, how many pics do you need of the Chiesa Madre? It’s beautiful, don’t get me wrong, but c’mon! Anyway, I finally get to the church, and there’s a line. A long one. Like, what’s the deal? Turns out, it’s a wedding. And guess who’s officiating? Yep, yours truly.

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